Well, okay they didn't say that, but they did come here, from Venus, and they sure as hell are out of that bubblegum, 'cause these dudes kick some serious ass.
Valient Thorr are a group of intergalactic duders that crashed on Earth (North Carolina, specifically) in 1957 (so, they waited ten years after the Roswell incident, not to cause too much suspicion, I suppose), having traveled through space for several thousands of years. Originally, they're from a place called Burlatia that's located somewhere on the planet Venus, and, apparently, they're huge stars there, because if you google-image Burlatia you get a bunch of pics of Valient Thorr themselves.
It is my humble opinion that us Earthlings should feel honored that VT chose to come to Earth to "warn Earthlings about the error of our ways, delivering a message of redemption wrapped in rock n’ roll, with pounding drums and shredding guitar licks". So, hey, if you have a message delivered in the form of pounding drums and shredding guitar licks, I'm all ears baby.
With hard rock as the means of their communication with us Earthlings (and they do mean hard rock when they say it), they have been delivering that message since 2003, when they self-released Stranded on Earth (I guess they were homesick), but for their next three releases they got some help from Volcom Entertainment who thought the message to be of importance.
So, with this post I would like to honor and thank Valient Himself, Eidan Thorr, Voiden Thorr, Dr. Professor Nitewolf Strangees and Lucian Thorr for coming to our rescue and for giving us, among other things, A Thesis of Infinite Measure located on their second message from 2005 - Total Universe Man, and Infinite Lives (no less) located on their last message - Immortalizer.
Dudes, don't stop saving us.
A Thesis of Infinite Measure
mindnumbflesh waiting on homecell and lost loves found dealin with scabs
and no one ever lives signin papers and bells are fillin the sky with the schemes from the temperature rises and bats say wondering claps of dying basalt origins touching waving corner of the eyes
blind star legions hiding in cauldrons loving girls.
no. no man, play number 11, play that number 11…. yeeeah.haha.
the scanners are turned off and i got thirty or forty more minutes. relationships in real life are SO hard to handle with friendly friends touching breathing my way sultering on my wavelength. is my phone ringing? old gods dying under shades of anti-gravity we come from the water, we came from the air. pray for good tidings was a thought that kept repeating, but no one could ever find out said they, when will we wake up, and swim into the sounds?
mindnumbflesh waiting on homecell and lost loves found dealin with scabs
and no one ever lives signin papers and bells are fillin the sky with the schemes from the temperature rises and bats say wondering claps of dying basalt origins touching waving corner of the eyes
blind star legions hiding in cauldrons loving girls.
no. no man, play number 11, play that number 11…. yeeeah.haha.
the scanners are turned off and i got thirty or forty more minutes. relationships in real life are SO hard to handle with friendly friends touching breathing my way sultering on my wavelength. is my phone ringing? old gods dying under shades of anti-gravity we come from the water, we came from the air. pray for good tidings was a thought that kept repeating, but no one could ever find out said they, when will we wake up, and swim into the sounds?
swim into the sounds
Infinite Lives
Are you searchin' for a higher power? Or
has everything worked out just fine?
I guess the reason that I'm asking
questions, is that several things have
been on my mind.
There are motherfuckers workin' for
peace, and there are people who
couldn't care less
There are soldiers who are dying in the
street, and there are families that are starting to stress.
If you put the quarter in the machine.
Then you give the game all that you got
sometimes you run outta credits.
It all seems rigged, but you know that its not
They only collect once a month
And you have been pumping it every single day.
20 bucks doesn't seem like much
But if you type in the code then you can
blow 'em away!
They don't believe in your religion,
They don't believe in your space,
They only believe in your money,
When they're wiping it all over their face.
Some bloody question mama
Somebody was down in the front
Punch in this code and then press start.
You're the one that they're trying to hunt.
C'mon! They work in the schools
They work for the state
They program their lessons
To look good on your plate
You'll swallow it down
You'll eat every bite
Now the hooks in yer mouth
You won't put up a fight.
They wanted more, more and more
Butcher their husbands,
Kick down the door.
Run to the kitchen, grab ahold of the wives
Increase your stamina, now poke out her eyes.
Is this the life, that you wanted to lead?
Brainwashed for quarters, its freedom you need.
And how do we get it?
By killing our own?
Too late for questions
My silver is gone.
Total destruction!
Land and the sea
Missiles are launching, I'm playing for free!
Millions are dying, thousands are hurt
But I'll live forever, longer than dirt
Somebody watch me! I'll get the high score
You rack up the points by killing the poor
Infinite lives, thousands of men
We live forever! Let's play again!
Infinite lives, you're gonna die
Your codes are worthless
It was a lie, Infinite Lives
It's in your head. No one lives forever
You're already dead
Are you searchin' for a higher power? Or
has everything worked out just fine?
I guess the reason that I'm asking
questions, is that several things have
been on my mind.
There are motherfuckers workin' for
peace, and there are people who
couldn't care less
There are soldiers who are dying in the
street, and there are families that are starting to stress.
If you put the quarter in the machine.
Then you give the game all that you got
sometimes you run outta credits.
It all seems rigged, but you know that its not
They only collect once a month
And you have been pumping it every single day.
20 bucks doesn't seem like much
But if you type in the code then you can
blow 'em away!
They don't believe in your religion,
They don't believe in your space,
They only believe in your money,
When they're wiping it all over their face.
Some bloody question mama
Somebody was down in the front
Punch in this code and then press start.
You're the one that they're trying to hunt.
C'mon! They work in the schools
They work for the state
They program their lessons
To look good on your plate
You'll swallow it down
You'll eat every bite
Now the hooks in yer mouth
You won't put up a fight.
They wanted more, more and more
Butcher their husbands,
Kick down the door.
Run to the kitchen, grab ahold of the wives
Increase your stamina, now poke out her eyes.
Is this the life, that you wanted to lead?
Brainwashed for quarters, its freedom you need.
And how do we get it?
By killing our own?
Too late for questions
My silver is gone.
Total destruction!
Land and the sea
Missiles are launching, I'm playing for free!
Millions are dying, thousands are hurt
But I'll live forever, longer than dirt
Somebody watch me! I'll get the high score
You rack up the points by killing the poor
Infinite lives, thousands of men
We live forever! Let's play again!
Infinite lives, you're gonna die
Your codes are worthless
It was a lie, Infinite Lives
It's in your head. No one lives forever
You're already dead
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